Dennie Gordon's comedy stars a fun-size Jennifer Aniston clone named Amanda Bynes as Daphne, an American teenager who lives with her boho mother (Kelly Preston) in a tiny apartment in New York's Chinatown.
The two are given to trading declarations such as "I love you a million Swedish fish!" and "I love you a million red M&Ms!". But that doesn't stop the girl disappearing across the Atlantic in search of her biological father, Henry Dashwood - an aristocrat, played by a stuttering Colin Firth, who has renounced his title to run for Parliament but is hanging on to his country estate, mysteriously located in central London.
The England that Daphne explores is a divided place. On the streets, everyone is either a hippie or a punk or a Rasta. Everyone in the interior scenes - all filmed in stately homes - is either a member of the royal family impersonated by a lookee-likee, a surly posh chap fixated on racial purity, or a wellknown Equity face, indulging in that genteel whoring for which respected British actors assume they will be forgiven. Jonathan Pryce, one of the chief offenders, makes it through to the end by delivering his lines in a quivery, breathless voice that suggests he is being gently fondled by someone just out of shot.
Eileen Atkins, conversely, gives it all the wallop she can muster. "I'm British!" she booms. "We only show affection to dogs and horses."
This film is firmly allied to the former species, but doesn't deserve a pat on the head from anyone
What A Girl Wants
Cert: certPG
