'The recent attack on Greta Thunberg is lame', says Laura Craik

Plus the importance of city farms and doting on godfathers
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By Laura Craik2 May 2019

If there’s one thing the Information Age has taught us, it’s that nobody is too young, too weak or too blameless to avoid the slings and arrows of outrageous slander. Our Palaeolithic forefathers could never have guessed what cankers would grow from those innocent stone tools that were the first evidence of human technology three million years ago. It’s a strange evolution when you start off doodling cave paintings and end up hiding behind a keyboard, spewing hate.

The recent attack on Greta Thunberg is so ridiculous that it would be funny if it wasn’t so lame. If anyone has earned themselves a free pass from the international sport of Casual Roasting, it’s surely Thunberg, the 16-year-old Swedish schoolgirl who has done more to tackle climate change than any politician. But no: according to one political blogger, she’s not a brave, outspoken activist who has inspired climate change protests in more than 100 countries — she’s a fraud, brazenly using her connections to elbow herself a platform. ‘Who could have guessed that yet another climate activist comes from an incredibly privileged background?’ the blogger fumed. The ‘privilege’ in question? Her mum performed in the Eurovision final 10 years ago.

I don’t know about you, but when I heard this shocking news, I turned up the heating, switched on the lights, quit recycling and immediately booked a flight to Australia. After all, it is a well-known fact that Eurovision confers power and status on all who compete in it. It’s why Sonia is head of MI5 and Jemini now run the country.

It was back in 2006 that the phrase ‘check your privilege’ was first coined, and while its intentions were good, the intervening 13 years have not been kind. Never a strong or stable device, London’s Privilege-ometer now seems constantly to thrum with an anticipatory howl of outrage. You’re a white man with hair? Shut up forever. You’re a kitten? Would that we all looked that cute. You’re Jess Phillips? Don’t claim to be working class when your mum held a senior position in the NHS. You’re Phoebe Waller-Bridge? How dare you have a double-barrelled name and be funny. Yes, privilege is all too often abused, but save your ire for those who really warrant it. Better still, channel it into something more constructive than bringing good people down.

Keep farm and carry on

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I don’t live on one of London’s more salubrious streets: it’s not uncommon to come home and find parts sealed off with police tape. While knife crime is rife, so are examples of community spirit: pockets of love blooming among the hate that bring hope to those without much. Established in 1972, Kentish Town City Farm is one such place, a hidden gem that everyone with kids seems to discover, thanks to glowing word-of-mouth endorsements. That this well-loved community resource is currently facing cash‑flow problems is extremely sad for its employees, as well as for the thousands who visit every year,

should these end in its closure. There aren’t many opportunities to connect with nature in this town, and while it will take more than a quick pet of a pig to solve the knife crime epidemic, I hope the farm survives.

Godfather complex

Richard Young/REX/Shutterstock

A magazine recently ran a feature on the ultimate society godfathers, gushing about how Sir Elton John (10 godchildren and counting, including two Beckhams) likes to serenade his on their birthdays. Manolo Blahnik (who professes to have ‘hundreds’) endows his with shoes, ‘lunches at Wiltons and a real cultural education. Manolo’s never happier than when discussing Visconti or Fellini classics’, appaz. In our family, it’s the godmothers who rule: yes, they remember the kids’ birthdays but, more importantly, they make the time to see them. Big ups to the godmothers.

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