Should you crowdfund your house deposit from your wedding guests?

In London's tough climate, does asking for money for mortgage kill the wedding romance, or does it actually bring you closer to your guests?
Paula Erizanu28 July 2016

The romance of weddings flounders in tougher economic winds. Just as you might have asked for cash rather than presents for your birthday as a teenager, you might now, as a bride or groom, ask your guests for the same.

According to an article in You and Your Wedding, a number of newlyweds are taking this route.

Sara, a recent bride, told the magazine: “I literally have everything I need and no room to store anymore. It makes more sense to ask for cash instead of pretending a bread maker is amazing and then guiltily putting it on Gumtree.”

But it's not just honeymoons that are being crowdfunded by wedding guests - the latest gift lists are asking for contributions towards house deposits. Does this kill the wedding spirit or is it understandable to avoid wasting unwanted bread makers and ask for what you really want?

As always, it depends how you package your request.

Olivia Knight recalls, “When I got married in 2010, I thought, I really don’t need a traditional list but I didn’t want to put my bank details in an invite either. Lots of people had done it; friends had said, ‘Don’t give us presents; if you want to help with our honeymoon, here’s the link to our HSBC account’ – but it felt cold”. So instead she founded Patchwork (patchworkit.com) – a registry where the newlyweds choose a large item they’d like funded but which is broken down into a “patchwork” of personalised small requests. Their most popular gift is a honeymoon, and guests contribute to it by buying everything from beers on the beach for £5, right up to a flight for £500. But patchwork’s second most popular gift has been... a house deposit.

Wedding venues near London

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Olivia explains, “If you think about it, it feels so brutal: ‘We’re getting married, give us some money for our mortgage. But it’s the way people do it. Asking for little things for your new home such as a bag of cement for £30 or letterbox for £15 makes it fun and personal.”

With London property prices still out of reach for most, cement and extra square metres of land as wedding presents seem more digestible. Space has become the metropolitan shared dream - and Londoners are going back to basics.

Although funding your friends's living room or future children's bedroom might remind you of playing the SIMS video game, it might represent a step away from needless waste and a step towards more rational, necessity-based consumer behaviour.

Just like in some traditional societies where the whole village joins to help newlyweds build their new home, Londoners can be part of creating their friends' future nest.

So what at first appears a pragmatic, cold request transforms into a way of bonding with your guests. How times are changing...

To read the original article in full, see the latest issue of You and Your Wedding magazine now. youandyourwedding.co.uk

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