This Love exclusive extract: Lotte Jeffs's new novel on recoupling with the one that got away

Nowt so queer as love: as Lotte Jeffs’ new novel will attest
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Lotte Jeffs8 February 2024

A steamy love affair grips the life of a man who has walked through the worst paths of the romantic jungle. Ari has seen it all: the toxic partners, the hidden secrets and the heavy weight of grief. But as a flicker of light hits his dim corner of the world, he realises there are perhaps less secrets worth keeping. Lotte Jeffs tells all about the fictional romance in her novel. To celebrate the release of her tantalising new read of friendship and queer love, here is an excerpt teasing an unfolding frisson at a school reunion between Ari and the classmate he admits to having always found attractive...

Ari was wearing his shortest shorts and a sleeveless silk shirt. On the dance floor, his eyes clashed with strangers, held there for a moment as a silent yes or no passed between them, and then moved on, scanning and assessing and occasionally acquiescing. Once you understood the rules, cruising for guys was deliciously transactional. It was dark and the lights spun from blue to red, while a disco ball cast white sequins onto the surrounding mirrors. Then, a flash of recognition.

He shimmied closer, circled him like prey, and when the song was right, he shifted so their hips brushed against each other. He silently pressed his chest into Sam’s, still responding to the beat of the music. The denim of his old friend’s shirt felt sturdy against his own whisper of clothing. He wrapped his arms around Sam’s neck and Sam took his waist like it was the last dance at prom. Ari kissed him then with a passion he worried was too violent. But Sam moved with it, taking his lips softly when Ari pressed hard, pushing more when Ari melted. It was a give and take of equal power. Sam’s baseball cap fell to the floor, and it broke the spell.

‘Well, hello again, mister,’ he shouted over the music.

‘I wish all school reunions were like this,’ said Ari, taking his hand and leading him to the outdoor space so they could talk.

‘Finally, after all these years, I get my answer. You do like me like that.’ Sam stood directly in front of Ari with his arms crossed, smiling playfully. Ari blushed and fiddled with the pearl hanging from his ear.

‘I’ve always found you incredibly attractive.’

‘You could have fooled me!’ Sam laughed and placed a hand on Ari’s lower back. Ari imagined how the fabric must feel against his palm. He hoped the way he softened signalled something to his friend that he wouldn’t have to say.

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