People on the internet weren’t happy to see Nicole Kidman loving life at the Oscars

In a sparkling black Armani Privé sheath dress complete with a thigh-high split, Nicole Kidman, 55, posed like a pro for the cameras as she arrived at the 2023 Oscars.

She was not messing around: hair tossing, coquettish waving, smouldering stares. She may or may not have indulged in a few sips of whatever lavish nectar they serve at Hollywood awards dos. Who cares? You probably would have too.

Some said she was a ‘queen’ and ‘fierce’ but plenty said her behaviour was ‘erratic’ and ‘odd’ — words which are of course code for ‘intoxicated’. And naturally there was some guy called Brian letting Twitter know he thought that, “Even at the age of 55 Nicole Kidman still has a nice bit of leg.”

Joined by her country music singer husband Keith Urban, also 55 — who you suspect is never far from a pair of GHDs — the Big Little Lies star spent much of the evening snogging him and having a lovely time with her friends, including Emily Blunt and Jamie Lee Curtis. And ‘how bloody dare she?’ has been a large slice of the take home.

How dare she behave in this unrestrained, carefree and confident way? How dare she not consider what people on the Internet might think of her stridently enjoying herself? How dare she not cower modestly in a corner like any respectable woman of her age should? Why is she playing up to the camera rather than demurely smiling?

The response to Kidman on the carpet reveals how easily people lose their minds if women don’t act or dress like ‘age-appropriate’ robots. How easily people judge women for simply having fun. How rigorously people search for something to criticise.

The way Tweeters wrote “IS NICOLE KIDMAN DRUNK?” with aggressive pearl clutching, you’d think she’d vomitted over The Rock’s ballet pink Dolce & Gabbana suit. You’d think she’d stormed the stage and physically assaulted someone. All she did was give a baying crowd what they wanted.

But, as much as the sexist criticism about her swagger and speculation about drinking is galling, it is also not ideal when people say variations of “ooh but if I looked like that at 55...” because that implies women can only do or be things if they look a certain way. And once you notice how ingrained these sorts of conditions about women’s behaviour are you can’t unsee them and you realise they’re everywhere. It’s fairly dementing.

Even in 2023 we still can’t see an accomplished woman being confident — maybe a little tipsy — and owning the room without needing to either state or imply that she’s somehow defective.

The truth is, Kidman’s joie de vivre at the Oscars was entirely appropriate, not least because it was fun, unselfconscious and most importantly, entirely on her own terms. Think we can all drink to that.