The Boris diaries: chancing his luck with a lick of mango ice cream

 
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28 November 2012

DAY THREE - Tuesday

10am: If Boris Johnson was under the impression that his efforts to win over Indian business had fallen short, his first meeting of the day put paid to that. At a meeting with a major Indian business group in Delhi, he was welcomed as the "beloved" Mayor of London and praised for his "missionary zeal". He at least had the self-awareness to chuckle to himself when he was told his status "as a leader and statesman" had risen across the world.

But his boldness was reprimanded when the host of the business group told him: "Don't laugh, I'm serious".

Boris made his standard speech about attracting business to London, with an interesting aside... inviting steel tycoon Lakshmi Mittal to leave Paris to come to London and in doing so sparking a row with the French government. [Boris tells India: Choose the UK]. Could this be our first diplomatic row of the trip in the offing?

1pm: After a smooth Spice Jet flight down to Hyderabad Boris was shown round the new hub airport, presumably picking up some ideas for the Thames Estuary. The Mayor visited a local market in the bustling centre: our first taste of the other side of India. It's been a fairly gilded trip so far. But this was what I remembered the country to be like from my backpacker trip of 15 years ago.

As small barefoot boys ran after his entourage, chatting excitedly, he was urged into open-fronted shops - key cutters, fruit and vegetable sellers - by local businessmen peddling their wares.

A proud local ice-cream seller insisted the Mayor try his mango flavour. After a few awkward glances with his aides, clearly trying to fathom whether it would result in a serious dose of Delhi belly, he had a lick.

Later, he was back to his comfort zone in a room full of British businessmen and women on their own trade mission. Out came the London stories, bizarrely a Brompton bicycle and, of course, the jokes.

"In London we have a Gherkin, a Shard and a Pickled Onion. But never in my life have I seen a building shaped as a fish," he told the group, referring to a remarkable silver Nemo-shaped building spotted on the road in from the airport of this evolving high-tech city. "And you've got your chips too," he added. "Silicon ones."

Day two: Monday

8am: Today is the fourth anniversary of the Mumbai hotel terror atrocity in which 166 people were killed. The Indian papers are claiming that the country still isn’t equipped to deal with another attack. Worrying. Home Secretary Theresa May is flying out tomorrow for a national security briefing. We’re staying in one of the group of hotels that was targeted. Trying not to think about it.

10am: First stop this morning is the British High Commissioner’s residence – a sprawling white villa surrounded by lush tropical gardens. There was lots of tea and biscuits on offer as we waited with 100 school kids for the arrival of the Mayor to hand over the petals from the Thomas Heatherwick-designed Olympic cauldron. The roller-skating, dancing, ball-throwing children were very sweet, and outshone the formal speeches. Boris looked slightly taken aback when the president of the Indian Olympics Committee suggested the London transport system might have been “chaotic”. Have you ever driven through Delhi? He recovered his composure enough to play cricket with the kids, just as the England team were thrashing the Indians in Mumbai. (http://bit.ly/V83f8F ). His criticism of the BBC advanced to a whole new level when he shouted “Let’s get the BBC cameraman!” before whacking the ball in the poor man’s direction (he missed).

1pm: Boris went off for lunch with the editors of the main Indian national newspapers. I wonder if the Leveson inquiry came up? Earlier, he told us he was “nervous” that the British media would head in the “opposite direction” of free speech if the Government brought in statutory regulation. “I can tell you that compared with most other jurisdictions in the world, we have a political system that is largely free of financial corruption and bribery. I think it is very largely because we have a pretty uninhibited, vociferous and exuberant media that gets on and turns over all sorts of flat rocks. If you go around sterilising, pasteurising and homogenising the media you will have a bad effect on our democracy."

3pm: Now at Boris’s speech on student visas at Amity university just outside Delhi, which is planning to set up a 15,000 student campus in London and which a colleague told me was India’s equivalent of Oxbridge. He was greeted with Prime Ministerial-style fanfare – a 50-strong army cadet guard of honour and a 100ft red carpet. “We should have this at City Hall,” he muttered as he arrived at the front entrance of the university. Student visas are the issue of the day with the Mayor warning the Government it is causing “unnecessary alarm” with tough new visa rules that are putting off Indian students from coming to London. (http://bit.ly/V83hgI).

8pm: But at a drinks party back at the High Commissioner’s residence later – held for visiting London uni vice-chancellors – there was some suggestion Boris’s warnings might end up perpetuating the myth and deterring Indian students even further. He made a funny speech – with references to Charles Darwin thinking up the theory of evolution in Bromley – which had the guests chuckling into their G&Ts. The Mayor went off for dinner with his trade delegation – also including Berkeley Homes’s Tony Pidgley and John Lewis’s Charlie Mayfield – while the rest of us trooped back to the hotel and our laptops.

Day one: Sunday

6am: We’ve just landed in Delhi – our first stop on Boris Johnson’s week-long tour of India. The Mayor has been boasting that he’s had a good few hours' sleep – unlike the press contingent, who emerged from the BA flight with stiff necks and bleary eyes.

Boris bought a premium economy ticket (it is on the taxpayer after all) but was upgraded to business class. But it was almost the journey that never happened. Senior City Hall aides were tearing around Heathrow trying to find their boss less than an hour before departure. Turns out BA had bumped him up to the first class lounge while the rest of them were left languishing in business.

On arrival in Delhi, Boris was whisked through passport control and customs to a waiting chauffeur-driven car. He writes about his first impressions of his India trip here (http://bit.ly/Un4Tks ).

3pm: Feeling a bit better after a few hours' sleep in our hotel – the Taj Mahal – and we’re now at the wonderful Akshardham Temple, apparently the world’s biggest Hindu shrine.

Indian tourists and visitors crowd round, curious about the man with the sticky-up blond hair, but there seems to be some confusion about his identity. I heard Boris Becker, Richard Branson and Prince Charles’s names all mentioned but not the Prime Minister’s, which Boris might be disappointed about. "I know he's not your PM," said one man. "He's James Cameron." Cue lots of obvious jokes about sinking ships.

At our next stop, the iconic India Gate, where he was mobbed by locals who also didn’t have a clue who he was but knew a celebrity when they saw one, Boris shrugged off the case of mistaken identity. “I reckon I could give Boris Becker a run around on the tennis court if I was asked to,” he quipped.

The British media were out in force, and in a radio interview with the BBC, Johnson made some surprising comments on the prospect of an EU referendum. "With the greatest respect to the in-outers, I don't think it does boil down to such a simple question,” he conceded.

10pm: Stories filed, and it’s off to the bar to catch up with colleagues and the delegation, which includes the fascinating Standard Life chairman Gerry Grimstone. But a couple of beers later I’m struggling to keep up with the broadcast boys (the Mayor has apparently long since retired) so I decide to head to bed.

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